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Roddy Piper
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xx Piper's Personal Pit
« Thread started on: Feb 24th, 2007, 10:40am »

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Journal.
I refuse to say 'Dear Journal' cause I ain't gonna call nothin' that could be a guy dear. That's just wrong. I guess some sickos could be like that, but who would wanna ruin any chance of ever being considered a man again?! Plus, just sayin journal is not only more manly, but more more...moooooore..... manly. I'm the great RP!!! I need more manly than everyone else.

Sooo... I guess I'm sposed to talk about my life in here. Don't see what good that's gonna do. Tellin what goes on in a little book that can't even keep a secret... what a waste of good cow hide. I bet ya could make a good boot out of some good cow hide. Ain't one of these poetic fools gonna think o that... they too caught up in this 'nature' craze. Why, hell, a cow could symbolize longer life and prosperity... in that case it might be my dead uncle.

Ahhh well... I met this animal activist kid the other day. He ain't too bad... a little sheltered, but not too bad. I don't think the kid's ever had a drink in his life. Might be for the better though... poor kid needs to hang onto them animals cause alcohol causes nothin but trouble... but I sure as hell ain't giving it up. I'm no alcoholic, but I sure do love the stuff.

I also met this girl named Fayre. "Rodwdy" Roddy Piper thinks she has a thing for him, but ole Roderick Toombs thinks there's not a chance. That lady is way too nice to like a fella like me. I'm a fighter!!! A FIGHTER! Ain't no dang way no woman is going to stay in my presence for more than a day... or a few hours. I wonder if I smell bad... I don't think so... Roddy Piper could never smell bad... that's for hobos... and the great RP is no hobo.

Well.... time to quit writin now. Geesh... I might start thinkin that I'm one of them artzy fartzy guys.

RP

« Last Edit: Apr 1st, 2007, 10:27am by Roddy Piper » User IP Logged

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Roddy Piper
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xx Re: Piper's Personal Pit
« Reply #1 on: Apr 1st, 2007, 10:27am »

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Hey Journal. Listen up. NOW.
When RP talks, people listen; and that sure as heck doesn't exclued a little book like you. Oh God... I'm talkin to a book. Must be the pollen in the air or somthin', my head feels all stuffy. I need to work on that immune system stuff.

Enough bout that stuff though.

That girl named Fayre Harper... yeah... I sure do find lotsa ways to screw myself up when I'm around her. Hell, I wasn't even drunk! Just goes to show that a fighter is not meant to be a gentlemen. Good by Roderick, hello Hot Rod. Maybe if I combed my hair back and wore some of that fancy stuff that smells lie dried prunes... noooo. I can't do that. That stuff isn't me, and ain't no way I'm gonna bother with a lady if she can't accept me as I friggen am!

So I'm sittin here like a daggum fool, writting in a smelly old book about my feelings. I'll be darned if that ain't a major change. What happened to men being all macho and holding their feelings in? What? That isn't the in thing anymore? It needs to be. I'm tired o seein guys wining about "ohhhh I can't get money." Easy. Get a damn job! "Ohhhh, Lordy I'm a sinner." Alright. Repent and mabey God won't get tired of yeh yappin. "Ohhh, I'm a alcoholic that likes to fight and cuss and..." wait... that's me heh heh.

Well.... it's just bout time for me to call this writting stuff quits. If I ever need to tell something to this little book again... I'll be sure to drink some before hand.

I wonder if I ramble too much. Nahhh. Great people like me don't ramble. I have the gift of gab, that's it.

RP


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Roddy Piper
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xx Re: Piper's Personal Pit
« Reply #2 on: Apr 26th, 2007, 8:48pm »

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Okay, listen up cause I'm way short on the fuse today if ya know what I mean. Ya know those days when ya feel like yeh just had a big glass of beer and yer stumblin down the road and some punk wants ta start up a fight wit ya, knowin that yer full well gonna beat their ass to the ground... well...I feel like that punk... after have my face pushed into the ground.

Naaaaaaah... it sure as hell wasn't no fight that did this. It was one of them foreigh creatures we call women. THEY ARE NOT OF THIS PLANET!!! My God. One day they're all haaaaapy to see ya, and the next, geeesh let's not even open the door and say hi. I know what puberty was like, and she's old enough to have gotten over PMS. I think... wow... I hope she is.

I need a beer. No. A bed. Noooo. I need a fight. Yeaaaah that's xactly what I be needin'. I have gone way too long without a good fight. I want to have a tooth knocked in. I wanna bleed so bad I think my brains are gonna fall out. I just ain't got no challenge.

I knew this god forsaken town would be tha death of me. I say god forsaken cause ain't but a few people here even look like they got God. Bunch of low life murderin' scowdrels that think they own the world. If I had a damn penny for evey moron in this town that thought they stood a chance at having everyone kiss their dirty asses for a change, then I'd be five dollars short of another beer.

That reminds me... WHY IS THERE TAX ON ALCOHOL?! Do they want another war on their hands? I'm homeless, I'm drunk, and I sure as hell don't got no manners... there ain't no chance for me to get out of this place. IT DRAWS YOU IN! I only seen people escape by death. Boy o boy I need ta stop now or else I'm gonna get one of those cramps in my head. Somebody told me it was cause I tend to think to hard. I tend to think that I don't think at all.

Ahhh welll

RP
« Last Edit: Apr 26th, 2007, 8:55pm by Roddy Piper » User IP Logged

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xx Re: Piper's Personal Pit
« Reply #3 on: Jun 4th, 2007, 7:46pm »


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So I was lying there in my bed at the inn and I began to think. How the heck am I supposed to make a great name for myself I ain't out there doin' nothin' great? Oh well. Shoot. The say I do somethin' worth commendin' well... I won't ever do nothin' commendin'. Can't say I didn't try.

Turns out the thing with that one lady didn't work. Never does. Women can't handel my manlyness. Shut up ya stupid book! I ain't no speller. If I wanted a career out of spelling then I wouldn't be a fighter. By golly I'd have to be smart.

One beer. Two beer. Three beer. Four. Seven more to hit the floor. What? I can hold my liquor! Now that I think about it... the Tavern is just below me and it's safe to say that I have a rumbly in my tumbly if ya know what I mean.

Nighty night.
RP
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Roddy Piper
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xx Re: Piper's Personal Pit
« Reply #4 on: Nov 3rd, 2007, 1:42pm »

'Ey, book thingy!

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!!!!
Get ready for more thoughts from the Great RP!
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Roddy Piper
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xx Re: Piper's Personal Pit
« Reply #5 on: Nov 4th, 2007, 05:31am »

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heh heh Hot Rod gets to go catch himself a criminal!
Damn sober journalist had to come ruin things though. That's what he gets fer not drinkin as much as he should.It's unhealthy to go sober. I should know that.

Off to find the son of a biscuit eater that shot the journalist fella.
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Roddy Piper
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xx Re: Piper's Personal Pit
« Reply #6 on: Nov 18th, 2007, 1:30pm »

I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.
I'm gonna catch a criminal.

Take that stupid criminal. Imma gonna catch ya if I can!
Boy that sounded stupid. Oh well, everybody pays the Piper. I'll show that good for nothin' low life to mess with the rudest drunk that ever lived!
Yeah yeah yeah, that guy's a gonna regret the day he smarted off to Rowdy Roddy Piper. Because I was rowdy before rowdy was cool, and let me tell ya, I ain't takin no crap from NOBODY!
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